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Archive for November, 2007

Every sex toy connoisseur should have a glass toy. If my video (see below) doesn’t convince you, perhaps this review of my first glass toy, Blue G-Spot Pleasure Swirl, will.

A lot of people love glass toys just because they’re so pretty; there’s a reason for the note on this one that it won’t stand up on it’s own: because people love to display them like they’re Chihulys. Mine reminds me how much I loved marbles when I was little, not to shoot, but to hold and inspect. I would project myself into those little spheres like they were snowglobes of other planets or little mermaid shelters. The weight of the glass and the colorful ribbons and swirls inside are so pleasurable to hold and peer into.

The sexiest reason to love glass toys is that they’re HARD: when you’re stimulating your g-spot or prostate, you want something firm with no give, and something that gives you enough leverage to put a high level of pressure on the right spot; this toy does that with the glass and a nice amount of length to get a good grip and really grind. I’ve found that it also helps to have a toy with a pronounced curve if you want to really work on your g-spot and unfortunately, my first glass toy doesn’t have enough of an angle for me to say it’s absolutely PERFECT for that task. I still made it work, of course, because I’m a pro (haha), but for vaginal penetration and g-spot stimulation, I think I’d prefer something like THIS (with full curve) or this beauty (in a delicious large).

Not only do those toys have more pronounced curves, they have bigger, more bulbous heads which I also prefer for working over my g-spot; it’s not that I need or want a huge phallus (in my next toy review you’ll see that just a little bit bigger can be TOO big) but I do like a little more popping action from a dildo when I’m masturbating and more surface area for stimulating my g-spot.

After trying it out on my pussy, I decided this toy is actually the perfect size for my ass. Here, let me show you:

Video taken from webcam show archive, hence the low quality.

As many of you know, I’m not a big double penetration fanatic, but this dildo would be perfect for reaching around and sliding up my butt while Delia’s cock fucks my pussy; the shaft is long enough to not require too much contortion and the straightness of the toy means she’d probably be able to feel it really well while she’s inside of me.

I feel compelled to mention some of the “boring”, practical reasons people (especially women) love glass toys: they’re non-porous, easy to thoroughly clean, great for people with allergies, shifty pH balances, or sensitivities to chemicals (which most cheap sex toys have), and they’re compatible with all lubes (unlike many silicone toys which go gloopy if you use them with silicone lubes). Glass toys are on the expensive side, but they have a long life: they won’t get discolored, they won’t melt in the sun, they won’t tear or get bent out of shape and I have never heard of anyone chipping, breaking or shattering a glass toy either; that is saying something since I’m in an industry where people share this kind of information and talk to each other about their favorite toys, their biggest toy failures, and their sex toy accidents. We really USE our toys often and put them through a lot of abuse — we’ve all dropped toys during webcam shows and shoots so none of us want anything even remotely fragile. In fact, I know a couple of chicks with their own sites who use glass toys almost exclusively — not just because they’re pretty but because they prefer the way they feel and that they’re made with a safe material that doesn’t give them a chemical burn.

You might wonder why I haven’t reviewed my first glass toy’s efficacy for clitoral stimulation; that’s because I mostly use vibrators when I masturbate my clit (which means the ENTIRE network of nerves; as you saw in the video I can put my magic wand above the head of my clit and get a trickle-down effect). If I weren’t so lazy, though, I’d say a glass toy of any kind would be great all lubed up and stroking a clit, especially if you were watching yourself in a mirror (yes, I like watching myself, specifically my pussy, while I masturbate); if I still lived alone, I’m sure I’d do exactly that. I would hold the glass dildo by the shaft, aim the lube-heavy head downwards, placing it just above my clit, then I’d slide the head down over my clit and up, down and up, repeatedly. I think this would work especially well with legs closed, and in this case the smaller girth and less bulbous head would work perfectly nestled between chubby labia, sliding up and down over my clit. The smooth surface of the glass is great because there’s no drag with lube and you can also heat and chill glass toys.

Long story short: I can’t wait to add more glass to my toybox!

People, especially women, often write to me asking how they can run a site like mine, etc. Answering those questions is always on my back burner; in the meantime, here’s one woman’s advice.

I love how her guide makes it clear in a raw, funny way that the path most people take to become pornographers is very personal; you can’t mapquest what is/should be a personal journey directed by individual experience (and some of those experiences aren’t ones you’d choose or that you can get from reading a tutorial). Most of us who wound up in the sex industry didn’t stop to get advice on anything except specific technicalities; we propelled ourselves into it by compulsion, circumstance, therapeutic need, entrepreneurial vision, and because it’s the perfect creative medium for our diverse skills and talents.

I believe all indie pornographers and webwhores who’ve had lasting power and found satisfaction and long-term profit from it never stopped to ask anyone in a general way HOW to do it. You recognize it’s for you, you do it, and ask questions later.

One of my favorite pieces of advice is her “find god” directive. It’s not about religion or belief in “GOD” necessarily, she’s describing something anyone who commits to an extraordinary life has to believe: that you’re capable of more and that you’re meant for what you choose. You don’t have to explain how magic happens or intellectualize it, you just suspend disbelief and experience it. Having some kind of a belief system, whether it’s delusional or not, that affirms your own goodness and the rightness of what you do is especially important, I think, when you’re doing work that is NOT publicly affirmed by society.

Due to disturbing problems with our neighbors we’re giving serious consideration to moving, if not now then when the weather warms up. The trouble is we LOVE where we live. We just don’t love that our neighbors live here, too.

That’s our backyard. It looks like there are no neighbors, right? And there aren’t, at least not on that side. That is the south side, the sunny side, the side that warms our souls. But turn the other direction to look north and you’ve got the dark side, the shady side . . . the side adorned with decaying mattresses and dramatized by domestic violence.

Growing up on the once-rural eastside of Seattle I was steeped in overcast dampness and have always loved mossy shadows, rain, and all of the other things people think are dark and depressing. Though I still live in Washington at a point still considered near Seattle, we live in a micro-climate that suffers from very little cloud cover. Some people call it The Blue Hole.

After five years of living here I’m finally getting addicted to the sun. This is the third house we’ve lived in together here, but it’s the first with really phenomenal southern exposure coupled with huge south-facing windows. Though it’s colder here than where I grew up, it’s hardly ever gloomy and is often sunny.

This might be the first year of my life when I’ve really felt gloomy about the days getting depressingly shorter so I am *loathe* to leave this house with its vacation-room, a room with a wall of window heated by southern sunshine. November, December, January, February — it actually gets HOT during daylight hours in this room during these months without even turning on the baseboard. It’s like magic, totally defying everything I grew up knowing about Western Washington. I can go there for an hour a day to sunbathe in brilliant light and lazily read summertime fiction; it has a holodeck quality that I just can’t give up, even if it means staying next door to a volatile woman and her abusive convict boyfriend.

Maybe when the days start getting longer again I’ll be able to say goodbye to the stunningly perfect location and southern light we have here, but I’ve been so spoiled by it that the concept of “southern exposure” as a desirable real estate characteristic is no longer just something to wishlist, it’s become a necessity. I don’t know if I can ever live without it again so long as we stay in the Pacific Northwest.

*****

I’d love to rant in more specific detail about our neighbors, but it’s been so exhausting dealing with them that I’ve not wanted to rehash it in blog form. Yet. Someday? Hope so.

Those of you who hate the automated loudtwitter posts? I am going to take them off and stop having them post here. Feel free to comment more if you have thoughts about the whole twitter phenom or preferences about how/where I use it.

A small sample photo from the set we shot last night, to be posted for members later today or tonight:

Also coming soon especially for my blog readers: I review my first glass toy (from PleasureMeNow).

My apologies for not finishing any of my five hundred blog drafts. And apologies for this particular post not being anything you will want to read, seriously.

I’m a little tense, feeling like I’m falling down on my job(s). Not getting everything done or really much of anything lately. I’m feeling a little emotionally drained from the family emergencies and some of the “feelings” it dredges up with me — my role, who I am in the family; I’m always the one who lives far away and works too much. My mom lives alone so having her break her arm to the point of requiring surgery and an overnight hospital stay is a pretty big thing, especially when it then falls on my sister’s shoulders to drive her around and take care of her after she JUST had her appendix taken out in emergency surgery herself, and has a barfing baby and husband to take care of, too. it’s a real triple whammy. I tell myself I shouldn’t waste my free ticket by getting stressed out over things I can’t help, but it’s happening anyway. There’s been some other stressful stuff going on too, but it’s a little too personal to go into right now.

Needless to say, the Thanksgiving I was so looking forward to has to be postponed.

At least I’m doing a good job with my exercise goal this week, having gone three days in a row and will go on Thanksgiving too to meet my goal. I am in such poor shape that my body is pretty tired, though; I need a few more consistent gym days to get to that point where I have MORE energy instead of LESS after exercising.

When I went out to “take care of” my sister over the weekend, I saw she’d purchased the Lord of the Rings dvd set. She said it was her five pound(s lost) reward to herself. I said “huh” to myself, and realize that I do a very totally fucking shitty job of rewarding myself when I finish things. I’m great at making lists, halfway great at checking them off, but I totally drop the ball on the reward/pat-self-on-back step. I imagine that I do congratulate myself and give myself internal warm fuzzies, but they only last half a second and then I’m already choking up on fifty other listed tasks/goals/whatevers I want to get on to. Taking time and energy for proper praise and reward seem so inefficient to me!

It’s not that I deprive myself of happy treats and moments of luxury, I just don’t take the little bit of extra effort to TIE treating myself to finishing something or meeting goals. I’m going to try to do that more often. Today I decided that whenever I manage to talk to my mom on the phone, I’m going to reward myself with 15-30 minutes on the Playstation (I hate talking to my mom on the phone). I also decided I’m going to give myself a fucking break and allow myself to focus on this exercise task this week and be proud of myself for meeting my gym goal REGARDLESS OF WHAT OTHER THINGS I DON’T GET DONE. My health is pretty fucking important, and seeing what my mom and sister are going through with their own hospital visits really should bring that home to me, especially considering they have insurance and I don’t. What could be more important than me taking care of my body?

We also met our goal of not watching tv today. My natural reaction to that statement is that meeting the goal should be its own reward, but then I think I’m slacking again by not really patting myself on the back harder over it.

I’m going to go stretch and hit the mattress. Hard.

Every time you think I’m slipping off topic, I bring it right back — DON’T YOU WORRY ABOUT MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT! Just ride on it with me, okay?

Download File

• 23:08 Quite a weekend we’re having here. STRESSFUL. Think it’s time for me to write my Drugs: Part II blog entry. #
• 23:14 We need to have our audio off on our cams for tonight. #

These were chunks of my life yesterday as posted on my twitter page, automatically shipped by LoudTwitter

• 09:52 Power magically restored to KitchenCam sector upon waking. Zit Mountain theme park being erected on my chin. Must pack & ready for show. #
• 11:39 Hoping to poop before I start getting ready / wash my asshole in preparation for my show. Timing is crucial. #
• 11:53 Mission accomplished. #
• 14:12 Had GREAT butt sex with glass dildo during show & lots of nice hair & belly lovers. Packing now & getting ready to go to Seattle. #

These were chunks of my life yesterday as posted on my twitter page, automatically shipped by LoudTwitter

• 10:24 Head spinning trying to sort plans to travel/take care of nephew/sis, get pregnant, do my update, do all of my shows & clean house. STRESS. #
• 10:24 Head spinning trying to sort plans to travel/take care of nephew/sis, get pregnant, do my update, do all of my shows & clean house. STRESS. #
• 17:58 Gah! Turned on porch light, went kaplooey; 2 computers & cams down, dining room lights, etc. Didn’t trip any breakers; can’t find problem. #
• 23:56 Spent most of today doing housework & plugging away at tour redesign. Electrical prob means no porch light, no kitchen cam, no dining light. #
• 23:57 Spending weekend w/ my sister: see calendar for shows reschedules/cancels: tinyurl.com/22mssf #
• 00:06 Oh, saw 1st preview for The Golden Compass — I’m so excited I teared up. See also Gossip Girl & Extreme Makeover Home Edition. xoxo! #

These were chunks of my life yesterday as posted on my twitter page, automatically shipped by LoudTwitter