TastyTrixie: The Wandering WebWhore

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Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Big Clits and Big Voices

I went on a google adventure and discovered a guy who loves enormous clits and uses the word "hermaphrodite" to describe women endowed with them. That's his definition of hermaphrodite: women with prominent clits. It was all worth being exposed to his weird-ass opinion, though, because I got to see a photo of Linda Might, "The Queen of Clits", who I'd never heard of before.

Jesus, I'd love to have myself a three-inch clitoris.

Anyway, I can't stop thinking about all of this hermaphrodite bullshit and wishing I could grasp EXACTLY what is so fucked up about these rumours (and people's responses to them) and articulate that fucked-upedness accurately.

I can't stop thinking about being in our local candle store and hearing three people engaged in a discussion about Ann Coulter in which one person "informed" the other two that Coulter was "born a man". Yeah, she's a tranny! The two women gasped, one declared she'd always SUSPECTED as much, the other asked if he was SURE . . . and he WAS. He was SO FUCKING SURE. He insisted it was true. He backed it up with things he'd heard on Air America.

I wanted to interrupt and tell them they were wrong, but went home to check JUST IN CASE. Because there also seems to be something wrong with just ASSUMING those tales are false. Is it a growing acceptance/awareness (or heightened fear/paranoia/continued ignorance) of transgender that fuels these bullshit stories? Is it just a contemporary expression of misogyny / new way to express or justify hatred and disgust of genetic women people find contemptible or disturbingly sexy (ex. Jamie Lee Curtis)? Maybe, but there's a weird ambiguity about the way a lot of people talk about these urban legends, like teenagers who WANT to believe in ghosts. One part wishful thinking, one part pure bullshit, and another part pure fear.

Standing in the store I mostly just listened even though they said some stupid shit that made me want to say, "HEY -- my girlfriend is transsexual; maybe you should watch what kind of moronic crap you let stream out of your mouth in front of strangers." Instead I called the store after I got home and verified that the Ann Coulter as Tranny story IS INDEED a myth, told them WRONG. But that seemed to miss the point, too. Even if she HAD been born with a dick, that doesn't explain her away or make sense of her. That knowledge, if it were true and we could attain it, wouldn't somehow put her in her place the way people seem to want it to.

Oh well. I'm sure more brilliant minds than mine have got this sorted out and published somewhere with a lot of fancy words and complicated double-talk that will never do anything to help make the average American get it. Someday maybe it will all get straightened out, but in the meantime women-who-confuse-us are the new Richard Geres and Rod Stewarts, with bellies full of cow semen and hamsters up the ass. The tabloids have proof that Obama's birth certificate is a fake, and we think if only someone would publish that photo of an infant Ann Coulter sporting a pre-op malignant penis, we could win this argument!.

Labels: body parts, celebrity, feminism, gender issues, pop culture, PORNOGRAPHY, sociopolitical commentary

posted by Trixie at 8/12/2009 12:39:00 PM -

5 Comments:

wordspace said...: "Jesus, I'd love to have myself a three-inch clitoris."

Ah, but just think how uncomfortable it would be. By the looks of it, hers is exposed all the time (too darned big to stay under the hood) so it would constantly be abraded by the inside of your underwear or the edge of your pad (should you be wearing one at the time). And in time, just as "cut" boys develop a desensitised layer of skin on their "tips" (in a process called keratinisation), so would your three-inch clittie. So what you gain in inches and wow-factor, you lose in sensation. I bet your tiny (for tiny, read "normal") one is really as sensitive and pleasure-giving as you could ever wish it to be, if you really think about it. It would certainly suit me, that's for sure.

Max (in appreciation); 4:52 AM
Anonymous said...: In regard to the word "hermaphrodite" as applied to humans, this is a person who has both male and female reproductive organs.

Actual hermaphrodites--as opposed to the various people called hermaphrodites, even though they are not--do exist.; 7:16 AM
Trixie Fontaine said...: Not in the cartoon format everyone imagines, though.; 1:07 AM
Tyler said...: I was born with a vestigial vaginal canal. I did not get any of the other parts associated with female genitalia or reproductive organs. The canal was not open to the outside, but was discovered when my balls would disappear into the opening (between the bottom of the canal and my scrotal sac) and be lost for days. I had an operation when I was 12 to close the opening of the canal. I was told that, had no operation been done, my balls would have eventually remained up inside the canal and become so overheated that they would have either ceased sperm production, or produced so little, that I would essentially have been infertile.

Although I have no external or internal opening to the canal now, I still can flex the muscles that line the canal, something like kegel exercises.

BTW, when I was a child, my father would sometimes talk to my mother about hermaphrodites, but it wasn't until my adult years that I realized that they were talking about me, all along.

As an adult, I was able to have children, but have, since puberty, wrestled with gender dysphoria. I am unsure whether the gender conflict is a result of my birth defect, or my knowledge of the defect, or a combination of both.

I don't feel insulted if someone uses the term hermaphrodite in reference to me, as long as they do not mean it in a derogatory way. It is no different than calling a girl a girl; you can say it as a statement of fact, or with a sneer to imply lack of fortitude, integrity, etc. So, it is more how the term is said rather than if it is used.; 10:27 AM
Trixie Fontaine said...: Hey Tyler, thanks very much for sharing/educating us on this and illustrating one of the ways it manifests itself in the real world.; 11:09 PM