TastyTrixie.com

Archive for the ‘art’ Category

Here’s the latest on our conception attempts along with a fertile piece of art I’m coveting.

Delia and I are trying not to eat out so often; we’ve actually done pretty well with that this year. It’s not that I mind spending the money on it because we don’t go totally crazy with it, it supports local business people and I need to get out of the house SOME time, but we aren’t even enjoying it that much anymore and do it more for comfort than anything else.

Anyway, we’re now motivating ourselves not to eat out by listing frivolous things we want that are in the eat-out price range and focusing on those when we feel tempted. $20-$25 is our average lately since we usually split something, so at the end of every week we manage not to eat out we’re rewarding ourselves with $25 each. Is that dorky? Whatever.

Since we didn’t eat out for a week, I used my money plus some other in my phone sex money stash to buy her:

I feel good about my purchase, partly because it’s something beautiful (way prettier than leftover mexican food) and partly because I bought it from some awesome bus-dwelling people. It’s always interesting to me when I compare what other people charge for their arts/crafts/work to what *I* charge for access to my porn, stories, shows and spycams. In many ways they’re incomparable, but at first glance I have to gasp at how relatively inexpensive it was to buy something as gorgeous as this doll, something that must have taken hours to make — something I myself can’t fathom having the time, talent, skill or patience to to make. It’s amazing to think about all of the life that goes into something like that from the sheep to the person collecting the wool to all of the steps in making the doll: shaping, dying and whatever else I’m clueless about.

It makes me wonder why I don’t buy MORE beautiful, handmade things. I love them, but it always strikes me as a luxury/something I’ll do LATER, when I don’t have debt; that way of thinking is pure fucking nonsense, though. And it really seems RIGHT for me to cycle the money people spend on me as luxury/entertainment/personal support by doling some of it out to other small-business people and artists, right? On top of that I think I feel more inspired to do better work when I spend time looking at and touching other people’s beautiful work. I spend most of my money on plastics and electronics and such, justifying it as being “for work”, but forgetting that I need personal/spiritual juice for my work to be worth doing.

*****

On Saturday I’m doing my civic duty at our county convention as an Obama delegate; I’ve canceled my shows that day rather than rescheduling them; there was no way I could get my other work (shoots, webmastering, etc.) done this week if I crammed show day into another slot. What I *have* done, though, is put a chat session at 9 pm Saturday night. I know that’s probably going to make it unattendable for some people, but I’m not sure when I’ll be home from the thing and want to have dinner and a break in between (my social juices being in always short supply).

A beautiful music video:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCPQws-4v2I&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6&border=1]

One of my favorite moments is the twig snapping under the wolf’s paw.

NEW DOMAINS

I couldn’t resist. I bought yet another new domain for a site I don’t currently have time to develop properly. Well, actually, I bought TWO new domains. Believe me, limiting it to two took a great amount of self-control, especially when I saw that my business Visa’s credit line was recently upped by $1k.

The latest concept site I’m buzzing about?

LOMOPORN.COM

“LOMO”s are Russian cameras with a cultish following of hobbyists and collectors. A long time ago I read a great article in Details about them and was intrigued by their utility in low-light conditions and the oogy otherworldly images they produce. Now that you can buy all different kinds of new (now Austrian-produced) LOMO cameras it’s a very accessible and inexpensive hobby with a built-in fan base, and you know how much I want to indulge my night photography cravings so this could be a practical and inexpensive way to justify doing that for both business and pleasure.

I’d also like to add a site to our little network that’s not totally dependent upon our own images and personalities; LOMOporn totally fits that bill while also blurring the lines between porn and art. On top of that, I’d love to shoot stuff with film using a real MACHINE without all this digital stuff. Lomography is a really inexpensive way to go about that.

So. I don’t actually own a LOMO yet. I’m thinking of buying this $75 Color Splash first, but maybe I should shop around awhile. Oh yeah, scratch that $75 bullshit: Amazon’s got a bunch WAY cheaper

Anyway, if any of this sounds exciting to you and you want to contribute, you could gift me a LOMO or shoot your own LOMO porn and submit it to the site. I haven’t figured out how much I will pay for submissions, but it probably won’t be a whole lot and of course you will need to sign a release so I can use them; I don’t think I’ll ask for exclusivity though, which means the photos will still be YOURS to use wherever you want in addition to appearing on the site; if they involve penetration shots you’d also have to provide proof that the person or people in the picture(s) are 18 or over and each of them would have to sign a release, too; I might actually pay by the photo rather than sets (with a minimum payment to at least cover the cost of film & development), and of course people whose photos are accepted would be comped memberships to all of our sites.

If you are juiced up about this idea and want to donate a camera, I’d love it to pieces if you sent it here:

Trixie Fontaine
1240 W. Sims Way #7
P0rt T0wnsend, WA 98368

If you don’t want to bother shopping around I’m adding a few to my wishlist for ease of purchase/mailing.

Oh, and the other domain I bought today? BORGPORN.COM which is a MUCH less practical site to develop. But someday? MMmmmmmm . . .

Sometimes I wonder how much time other amateurs spend putting together galleries for their updates. I suspect that I waste more time than most doing very silly things that other people automate. For example, I relish picking out a font for my domain name that will fit the mood of the photos. Then I waste a bunch of time placing my domain name image onto an appropriate spot on the photo that won’t cover anything up. I enjoy seeing the way the colors and the shadows and everything compliment each other. It’s ridiculous how much time I spend on these little tasks. But I like it.

Another thing I wonder about is the interplay between vanity, porn standards, market demand, individual fetishes, reality, legacy-building and “art”. I find myself sorting through hundreds of pictures of myself trying to pick through them and create an enjoyable gallery for members. It’s HARD though. All of these conflicting demands vie for my attention. First of all, I myself have a short attention span so I don’t really like looking at galleries of more than 25-30 pictures. I find it very repetitive and boring and wind up really not relishing a few really sexy images — it’s almost as though as soon as I see allllllllllllllll those pictures I find myself aware of the clock and that I need to hurry up and scroll through them. Perhaps this is just a function of my femininity though? Maybe guys don’t think that way. Plus most people in the internet porn industry slap together huge galleries of 75 or more pictures. But then again, lots of those galleries are built around girls who are flawless looking. Frankly I wind up with a very mixed bag of content. I have a few really flattering images (a VERY few), a lot of pictures that cater to individual fetishes (hairy, freckles, natural tits, etc.) that a lot of people withOUT those fetishes don’t really find appealing, and a lot of images that are artistically interesting but antierotic.

Full Gallery appearing in my Members-Only area with Sunday 2/2 update
JOIN NOW for access!

When I look at pictures like the one above I’m just not sure what to do with it. It certainly doesn’t depict me at my aesthetic BEST (see the chin fat, the exhausted expression, etc.) but it’s an appealing image. I think it would be more appealing to me if I were looking at a stranger though instead of myself. And then there’s the problem of it being on a “porn” site. Well . . . I don’t really think most of the stuff in my members area is “porn”. Although I love the porn title and feel it’s important to commit myself to challenging the stereotypes associated with the word (and the only way to do that is to call what I do “porn”) . . . really a lot of what I love making most is stuff that you would find shoved into a library book and accidentally left there. Seriously, that’s what I imagine most of the words and images on my site are really meant for . . . to be discovered with no explanation and no context. Just intimate photographs and jotted notes for someone to discover and wonder about, unable to decide if the women they’re looking at are ugly or beautiful, average or exotic, rare or commonplace, passive or aggressive. Unable to do more than imagine what the circumstances were surrounding the taking of the pictures or their lives in general.

I’d love to make a site (or *something*) like that and have fantasized about it before . . . something the captures the trespass of finding something that wasn’t meant for you but that you long to keep and wish you understood better. The kind of thing you want to stick under your mattress or save in a shoebox. The only hard part about doing a site like that is that with guest content I wouldn’t be able to give credit back to the models without destroying the mystery of the whole thing. MMmm. . . or maybe not. Maybe there could be little “unveil the mystery” links. And of course I could always pursue photography more and then I wouldn’t be under any obligation to give the models any credit at all. Sigh. One of a million unpursued ideas I have . . .

Speaking of doing more photography, I put an ad in the local paper for naughty people to pose for me. And I have fantasized about approaching young girls like an old rotten-toothed pervert. My sister and I were in McDonalds a few weeks ago and the girl behind the counter was fucking angelic. She was plump and had the sweetest face. So far I haven’t seen any barely-legal chubby girl sites (although I’m sure they’re out there) — the teen sites always seem to focus on the skinny underdeveloped set. But seriously, the baby fat look is just as provocative and sexy, I think. Anyway, I wondered if there was a way I could give this girl my card without totally scaring the shit out of her and having the law on my ass.

Anyway, back to my competing demands when putting together content for my site; somehow I feel like honoring those competing demands in a very inconsistent way that is my “special purpose” or comprises the personal “legacy” I am supposed to be building with my life. Although I feel conflicted about it sometimes and hypercritical of it, I LIKE that what I do is a mixed bag of all kinds of stuff: the thoughtful and the careless, the priceless and the cheap, the mainstream and the marginalized, the captivating and the repulsive, the dirty and the sweet, the pretty and the unpleasant, the hard and the soft, the forced and the natural, blah blah blah.

I don’t think that most people understand that when a girl has pictures made of herself . . . it’s not porn, it’s immortality. It’s the fountain of youth. It’s enduring proof that she’s a sex object in hard copy just like a girl in a magazine or Jesus’s words in a red letter edition of the bible.

DOWNSTAIRS
It’s really odd . . . houseboy is downstairs learning Premiere (Adobe video editing software) on the laptop while I’m upstairs working on galleries. We’ve exchanged a few emails this way (yes, we’re in the same fucking house and we’re emailing each other) and I find myself really enjoying it. I like being close but a little removed. Communicating without speaking.

Hahahaha! He just sent me an email telling me to quit slouching (he is checking on me on the spycams). Hehehe.