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Archive for the ‘PORNOGRAPHY’ Category

A truly upper-half-naked animated webcam shot of me:

Oops! There goes my "shirt" . . .

You can check out more Half Nekkid Thursday pics for this week here (links are in the comments).

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A lot of people are remarking on the decline of porn as a money-making industry in the wake of the AVN awards and AEE (Adult Entertainment Expo which used to be called Internext when we went). I don’t agree with all of people’s pet theories and some of the observations are either wrong or irrelevant or both, but it’s true that the business model corporate porn and webcam sites are built on is not sustainable; it’s been a steady downward spiral ever since I started camming in the year 2000 but for reasons more complex than any of those “top five reasons” listed like “porn star hookers”, who have a sum total of zero impact on the profitability of porn, or, if anything, INCREASE its profitability.

As my webwhore years go by, I am more and more convinced that the really valuable, addictive, and marketable aspects of internet “porn” have nothing to do with quantity or technical quality or extreme degree of hardcore. I become more and more certain that the tiny, simple, grainy, daily, personal living intimacies are the only things that can possibly hold their value. Too bad they are made virtually invisible by the vast machinery of corporate porn and unrecognizable by the way people have been trained by industry standards and freebie jack-off habits (and devaluing porn whores to the point of giving live face time with them away for FREE) to not SEE it even when they do run across it. I’m not *completely* bashing corporate porn which in many ways is often delightful, just ruminating on how much more potent pixelated animated .gifs and lifecams continue to be for arousing the kind of attachments and naughty feelings that make people want to be lifetime members of a site and collectors of everything someone makes.

I would love to be able to maintain industry standards while also returning to emphasizing our live content and lo-fi personal stuff more, but it’s nearly impossible to attract any attention or have industry people take your work seriously if you aren’t making so much content that you’re able to give 75% of it away for free (and tolerate that the other 25% will be stolen). Instead of spending time being more creative and fucking and masturbating, I have to spend more and more time building “promos”, hoping to dump enough free stuff into the oceans of free stuff to get enough fans to sustain our work.

Note: I totally agree that online gaming and simplistic, yet addictive and time-consuming interactive this-and-thats are taking attention and money away from porn. If I could afford to hire programmers to make a mafia wars style “game” for our sites I think we’d be rolling in dough (I am seriously inspired by the fact that enough people pay to play those games to make them profitable – I’ve been learning a lot from studying the way those “games” work on people’s minds and wallets; those facebook/myspace games have no real value — none at all — yet people feel compelled to shell out oodles of time and money on them; fascinating! I can think of a bunch of ways to apply those principles to porn sites, but of course don’t have the time and money to implement them).

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I am late posting my update for members this week which makes me want to make it extra special, except the reason it’s late in the first place is that I didn’t feel like I had something the right degree of specialness to post on Monday. Mulling things over. And building promos in the meantime, of course.

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Good news: I called the IRS this morning and was reminded once again that GOVERNMENT BEAUROCRACY IS AWESOME. No, I’m not being sarcastic. When it comes to customer service, the people who work for the IRS are gold. They are ANGELS of mercy. TRULY HELPFUL. So our debt crisis is averted and for now we can keep making all of our payments on things (but obviously still need to magically make assloads more money by April).

Other good news: I don’t know if it’s the B vitamin shot I got on Monday or having my period and a cold or eating better or stretching and exercising or what the hell, but the past couple of nights I’ve wanted about three hours less sleep than usual and have been feeling GREAT (except for the cold symptoms).

In other words, life is good . . . all is well.

Milf Renee: hot car upskirt in mesh panties

Busty Juliann on MilfHunter

I think MilfHunter has been around longer than most of the “Mothers I’d Like to Fuck” porn sites. It also epitomizes everything that’s embarrassing and offensive — and apparently successful — about porno schtick marketing. The guy’s gimmick  is that he “hunts” women. All of the words in these promos are exactly the kind of things that make anti-porners gasp in horror:

"He Doesn't Give a Piss About You"

The crosshairs over the dead-looking chick I think are the real “killer”:

MILFhunter has his sights set on your mom

How do I, personally, feel about this kind of language? Wellll . . . I’ve got mixed/conflicted feelings. I think people should talk about it and recognize it as problematic (and I have a *big* problem with anyone thinking it’s just 100% perfectly harmless and acting like you’ve got to be crazy to criticize it, which is how a lot of men in the porn industry react when you point these things out). On the other hand, it’s hard to take it seriously when it’s just so fucking silly. The notion of this character being a menacing threat is a joke, one that the people responsible for it are well aware of:

Big, menacing(?), pop-up MilfHunter head

Short uber-dork "hunter" & conqueror of Milfs?

It’s hard to argue that the site is really inspiring predatorial behavior when you see shots like this one:

Coconut babydoll makes MILF growl when applied to nipple?

Mainstream porn wouldn’t be mainstream porn, I don’t think, if it weren’t filled with lame, offensive jokes; if you can tolerate looking at it long enough you can see the “joke” is often on the guys as much as it is on the women, making a total mockery of themselves with their gun puns and such.

Yes, it would be nice if there were lots more wonderful and special non-junior-high-y porn out there to counterbalance it, but there’s not and it’s not really the fault of pornographers like the creators of MILFhunter to judge them more harshly as though they’re responsible for this dearth of woman-friendly erotica.

My main concern with sites like this isn’t the content and language itself, but how accessible it is to younger people, desensitizing people even further to violent and dehumanizing language about women (which is out there en force in all kinds of media, not just porn) and reinforcing those kinds of perceptions of women (attitudes that would be out there with or without porn but still — how gross is it to train your boner to spring up to that kind of language?), and how few people are able to talk about these things critically without going all whackadoodle extremist about it.  But can you really blame women if they take a quick look at this shit and say, “THAT IS SO NOT FUNNY AND I DON’T EVER WANT TO SEE THAT CRAP AGAIN!”, particularly if they’re among the too-many who HAVE been stalked and hunted for real by predators? It’s difficult to pass off as a “joke” when you look at it from a victim’s perspective, and you should recognize that there are a whole hell of a lot of victims out there. Too many. Still, the whole hunter vs. game concept pervades a lot of our language (have you ever read a romance novel? The kind women buy up in bunches? HELLO!).

Weirdo stalking woman in tanning bed.

So is it chilling? Or just a tasteless marketing angle that provides a cheap framework to hang the sex scenes on? For me it’s way less freaky (and, as a perv, way less creepily HOT) than the old “bird”-watching magazines (I wish I could find the blog entry I made about those).

On top of that, the only really offensive part (to me) is SOME of the advertising. Other ads and the content itself is just downright sweet vanilla. My impression is that the troublesome ads really don’t represent the kind of porn on the site – it’s a branding tool and a scene-setter. Guys jerk off to the sex, not the women-in-crosshairs banner ads, and hey — the only person I saw actually packing heat is one of the MILFs:

Sexy Russian Babe with Shiny Handgun

Yum! And I *love* that photo of him behind her “helping” her take aim, just as I love these sweet shots starting out with him undressing this scrumptious blonde followed by morphing into a harmless pantyhose-head:

MilfHunter is really just a tenderoni.

MilfHunter likes Sheer Underwear

Puffy Pale Pink Pussy exposed by MilfHunter

MilfHunter distracted from hunt by pantyhose antics.

Blonde Milf laughs at "Hunter".

One thing I appreciate about MilfHunter is that condoms are used in a lot of the scenes. I’m not in favor of OSHA or any other government agency (or the porn industry as a whole) mandating condom use (a topic for another entry), but when I see condoms used in porn it raises my opinion of the site or studio making the porn because it seems like they care about their talent.

Hot lady Becca in glasses on MilfHunter

And hello, thank you for a scene involving a chick and her vibrator and a man NEXT to her, then using the toy WHILE FUCKING — why aren’t there more scenes like this in porn?

Woman using a vibrator AND man for ultimate stimulation.

Anyhoo, enough with the analysis. Everyone I know (women too) who has joined this network of sites always has something good to say about it and usually they wind up rejoining, so here are a few more of my favorite samples from MILFhunter:

MILF Shayla getting soapy in short-shorts.

Brunette MILF in tiny underwear

Hot Redhead MILF with pale skin

Disclosure/Confession: if you join after clicking on one of my links to MILFhunter, I will get a referral bonus – thanks!

Oh, and members of OUR sites: Delia and I are doing webcam shows and chat this weekend (Friday night and Saturday) so hope to see you there!

Milf Renee: hot car upskirt in mesh panties

If I had a week or two to immerse myself in a certain type of kinky porn and vibe my clit into oblivion, it would start out with taboo toons, specifically a membership to JABcomix, a site I’ve admired since 2003 (but has been around longer than that).

He’s got a special flash book to celebrate Christmas (in addition to the other stuff):

JABcomix White XXXmas Toons

Note: if taboo fantasies trigger bad feelings for you, then this site (and many books you can get in Barnes & Noble, including Anais Nin’s _Delta of Venus_) is not for you.

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Hoping to blog pleasant and simple and personal notes tonight, but if not . . . I hope you enjoy whatever holidays you celebrate!

Ahhhhh . . . it’s webwhore drama time!! I’ve been waiting for someone to call out Alexa:

Reality and Faux Ho Bloggers on Carnal Nation

Kat’s response to that piece

Now that people are publicly airing their suspicions that AlexaRPD is a fraud, I’ll tell you why I started (and continued) linking to her and how/why my irritation with her escalated:

*I’ll pretty much link to any sexy-type blog provided one or more of these conditions are met:

• I’m hit up at the right time (when I have time to check them out & add them)
• they’re already sending me traffic (& I notice it on one of those rare days I check my stats)
• their blogs are told from a personal perspective
• they look like someone my readers/traffic would be interested in

Alexa’s blog qualified on all of those counts. I think the only post I read all the way through was her pet bunny post, which moved me. It also did something very few bloggers have the time or ability to do: it told a whole, coherent story. So . . . sex blog, nicely presented, obviously HAS traffic (and will continue to attract traffic) equals good link exchange for me. BECAUSE PART OF WHY I BLOG IS TO MAKE MONEY/attract members to my site.

At first I tried reading parts of a few more posts — the sexy ones — and while they do not do it for me and struck me as exaggerated and full of shit, I didn’t feel outraged even though I sensed the person writing the posts was manufacturing most, if not all, of the content in her imagination. I have HATED reading mean-spirited accusations about bloggers I’ve loved: that they must actually be men, that they couldn’t really possibly be for REAL, blah blah blah. I didn’t want to be one of those people and frankly I didn’t have the time or interest to read enough of her blog to gather “evidence” on her. I exchanged links with her to get traffic to my site and recognized that her blog is the kind that will have many loyal followers. While I may privately harumph at someone who just can’t ever get enough of throat-fucking (her specialty, if I remember correctly), obviously there are many wankers who eat that up.

I actually experienced what now sounds like a disproportionately higher level of irritation over how much she sounded a lot like another(?) Alexa who had a blog called A New York Escorts Confessions (also charged with being fake). I exchanged links with her once upon a time, too, even though that missing apostrophe right in her title DROVE ME FUCKING BATSHIT. I was way more aghast at her idiotic unwillingness to acknowledge and CORRECT her mistake (claiming instead that she did it on purpose for aesthetic reasons) than I was at her concocting or sexing up posts, but again — TRAFFIC. Those of you who blog purely for fun and attention and sparkling conversations in comments (GAG) may not get it (and be sputtering, “but . . . but . . . *I* deserve those sparkling comments more than FAKEY ALEXA does!!” which is probably true), but if I were to not accept traffic (and even PAY for it with reciprocal links and/or affiliate payouts) from sources I didn’t totally love and/or respect we wouldn’t be able to make a living on our sites. Seriously, whatever wrongs AlexaRPD has committed are incredibly small fries compared to the really foul and depressing shit I’ve dealt with from other “colleagues” so it wasn’t particularly troubling to me or something I felt like I needed to get to the bottom of.

Perhaps I’d have felt differently if she were claiming to be a camgirl, though, rather than an escort and former stripper. On the other hand, probably not. There are lots of sites I link to for money even though I don’t LIKE the people who run them or their work is not my cup of tea or who disseminate wrong/stupid information or whatever. I know some of you may find this appalling, but I only feel the slightest twinges of guilt over that. Like, that guilt is miniscule compared to the irritation, say, of a wayward hair in my sock pulling down on the skin between two of my toes. It’s not a whore sellout thing, either: today I saw that some of our very liberal friends took money from the government to provide training to the US Border Patrol to do some very UNprogressive freedom-eroding shit. When I think of all the civilians/non-sex workers who compromise their ethics for money (sometimes without a second thought) I really have a hard time feeling like I need to be a bigger boycotter and censor and ethical tightrope walker. I do not need to be up on the high horse other people insist on riding, instead I’ll stay down here with the common folk, shoveling shit and making money.

AlexaRPD follows me on Twitter (perhaps will be amended after this post to followED) and I have followed her back not just for the traffic exchange, but because she is constantly reading online and posts lots of pertinent sex worker-y news links before anyone else does. Is that one of the many red flags that she has way too much time on her hands to really be doing all the work and school and travel she claims? Totally. Does it make me want to unfollow her? No. I want to read the links she posts and I want the traffic. Didn’t much give a fuck.

But I *started* to give a fuck. The first time I started giving a fuck was when she posted a “Sex Ed” entry attempting to school  people on transgender and made some really glaring mistakes like writing as though all transsexuals are MTF (male to female) and just take estrogen for hormone therapy. When a transman got pissed about this in the comments, Alexa’s response wasn’t “OMG — thanks for pointing out to me that my information is completely wrong as applies to FTM transsexuals!” Instead it was hostile. Like the no-apostrophe defense, but much worse. I started writing comments but didn’t post them, realizing as the debate raged on in the comments and Alexa deleted sensible feedback without ONCE apologizing or hastening to correct her mistakes that THIS IS A PERSON WHO NEVER ADMITS TO BEING WRONG even when she should be totally fucking embarrassed to pretend that she’s right. And there is absolutely no point in trying to communicate with her. It irritated me so much, though, that I kept the comments I wrote (but didn’t post) in a draft in my mailbox. Here they are:

I don’t know if anyone else pointed it out as far as factual errors go (and I could be wrong too) but I *think* it actually IS uncommon — extremely — for people to be born with “well-defined sets of both genitals present”. I’m not an expert and I don’t think anyone could be, particularly when all of this stuff  (terms, expectations, scientific research) is still evolving BUT I can totally understand why people would get defensive, pissed and call you out on things. Like mostly-defaulting to talking about MTF transpeople and then not getting it when someone pointed out that FTM people obviously have a whole different HRT (hormone replacement therapy) plan. So as far as specific things to correct? The line “This might include surgical alteration, but may also include the commencement of hormonal treatments (estrogen, largely).” I don’t know if you meant to and didn’t get to it, or what. There’s no way to leave that as is and make it sound inclusive of FTM people and that definitely is a pet peeve of mine, that transwomen are fetishized and sensationalized and much more visible in the media like they are THE ONLY transpeople, while transmen are this invisible population — again where the people born with pussies are secondary to the people born with penises whose trials and tribulations and experiences are what all our discussions are built around with the biological cunt-owners being footnotes and exceptions to the rule instead of rulemakers themselves.

Being more specific about HRT *is* really important, I think, and it wouldn’t take that much space to add “usually estrogen & testosterone blockers for MTF and testosterone and progestin for FTM”. It’s really important for people to understand you’re not just ADDING hormones, but trying to counteract the ones you’ve already got.

So let’s call that Strike One for Alexa, the whole “never admits when she’s wrong” problem. With a cherry on top of “pretends she’s a ’sex educator’ when she is not”.

Strike Two was/is that she’s a shameless content thief and on top of that brags about all of the traffic she gets. I wouldn’t resent this if she got all of that traffic from her bullshit stories because writing those does take time and they ARE valuable to her readers regardless of whether or not they are true. Okay, I would still resent that a wee bit. But what REALLY pisses me off? That she gets and retains a lot of traffic from posting stolen  content on her erotic buttholes erotic facials erotic this and that picpost blogs. All of those shiny, pretty tumblers she’s so proud of are built entirely on her “collection” of photos she’s not in and didn’t take AND DOESN’T EVEN CREDIT to the real sites, photographers, or models except every so often on accident when the URL stamp hasn’t been cut off.

My ears are burning up just typing this, it makes me so mad. I remember seeing one of my friend’s faces smiling pretty with a load of cum on it in one of the pics Alexa posted with absolutely no mention of my friend’s name or her site and it just brought it home even harder to me that this person who pretends to be a sex worker, who pretends to be a sex worker advocate, is one of those people who thinks she has a right to capitalize on our bodies and our work for her own gain, to just TAKE our work like it’s free and redistribute. She’s like the guys on Craigslist who post that they have hard drives for sale with 437 gigs of porn on them that they’ve spent five years “collecting” or this one guy who wrote to me asking for a free membership to my site in exchange for the “collection” of menstrual porn he’d taken painstakingly snagged from here and there, by hook and by crook. When I angrily said no, he was like, “but I spent all of this time LABELING everything and putting them into folders! MY COLLECTION IS REALLY VALUABLE!”

Listen, I know most everybody’s been there before, very excited about the world wide treasure trove of free porn and bulletin boards and we want to show it off to people, our great taste in porn (or “erotic art”) and our amazing discoveries, but most of us had someone take us and shake us and remind us of a little thing called fucking COPYRIGHT. I am still a lot looser than other people when it comes to blogging on that — I don’t think you need to ask everybody for permission and think it’s fine to post stuff that’s out there for free already as long as it’s just a couple of samples AND YOU PROVIDE CREDIT to the original artist or a link back to where you found it or even just say “I wish I knew where this came from so I could credit the creators and models”. A blog-sized photo or three is like a quote from a book and seems to me fair use. But when your entire blog is comprised solely of uncredited porn? You’re just a thief. I’m apt to be forgiving when it’s someone who doesn’t know any better, but this Alexa person DOES know better, I’m sure of it, if she knows how to parse the language of 2257 laws while deliberately ignoring copyright infringement.

I am somebody who thinks copyright and trademark laws go a bit too far to the point where they constitute culture theft; I don’t want it to sound like I think every Joe Schmoe who posts a handful of pics on his rinky dink blog of his fave porn star should be prosecuted and fined thousands of dollars, but when someone has the audacity to brag about all of her traffic that’s built on stolen uncredited content, then she’s just a Big Asshole. And on top of that to have posted a portfolio that she claimed was of herself but was really photos of Princess Blue Eyez? That takes the theft to a whole other level and proves she’s a fraud (unless she is/was the model for that site).

Strike Three: it’s a petty one. But it was the day she told me I didn’t “get” what Twitter is for because I defended those of us who don’t feel the need/don’t have time to respond to questions tweeted to us. She is one of those “you owe a response to people” types who clearly doesn’t HAVE A REAL FUCKING JOB consuming all of her time the way we real sex workers do, those of us who realize it’s not our obligation to interact with and respond to people for free. Those of us who actually DO set a price on our time. And just goes back to Strike Number One of never admitting she’s wrong, which in this version is “there’s only one right way to do things (in this case use Twitter) and that is MY way”.

It all added up to me developing a blistering rage whenever I saw her saying similar things to other people, lecturing and chastising people who actually DO know what they’re talking about, who actually DO work their asses off and do jobs where we’ve sacrificed our privacy and taken real risks to do our work, all from this person who refuses to admit she’s wrong when it matters, even about little things. This person who doesn’t have the first clue or morsel of respect for our work, co-opting our work for his or herself thinking she can leverage her bullshit and ill-won popularity into a book deal or maybe just doing it because it greases his or her borderline personality disorder.

I’ve been wanting to say all of this for awhile now, but honestly didn’t want to be the one to step up and call her out on it because a person who has this much time on her hands could be the kind of person who will fuck with you indefinitely. And she certainly won’t learn anything from it or admit she’s wrong about anything so I just figured . . . WHY BOTHER?

Because who really cares if she’s a fake? Not her readers, apparently, who love an invisible woman with stolen pictures who never has a tired, stinky, or headachy story to tell about sex and ALWAYS sleeps naked and might invite YOU to a gang bang! And at first I was content to not care, either, until it wasn’t just about amusing herself with hypersexed tales to make ad sales to escort sites.

But I do care now. WE care. Those of us who pour our guts out for real, who HAVE our faces plastered with cum and other substances all over the internet, who are trying to make ends meet, who insist our time and our sex work is valuable and we should be compensated for it and our time in general, who HAVE gone to the schools we say we have, who are in some cases real educators . . . we care when you steal from us and then have the balls to teach people “sex ed” and gender ed and sex work 101 and scold us.

We care when you insinuate yourself into our virtual midst, insert yourself into our conversations and you can see US and take from US and pretend to be one of US . . . while you hide behind your charade. It’s fucking gross to those of us who are bonafide and verified. Those of us who have real work to do, posing for and/or shooting the pictures you steal, being real advocates for sex workers, actually TEACHING (as opposed to claiming we’re educators in interviews where your credentials are never verified), talking to real clients and customers (as opposed to simply amusing ourselves engaging in hot chat with freeloaders and teenagers who like our blogs). Yes, there are other anonymous sex worker bloggers some of whom I *adore* without question. But the thing is THEY NEVER DID THIS BULLSHIT ALEXA IS DOING. The content theft (to the EXTENT she does it), the hypocritical hand-slapping, and the offensive posturing.

To paraphrase a friend’s complaint, it’s creepy that this person knows who we are, but we don’t know who s/he is . . . and that person KNOWS he has an advantage over us when he talks to us . . . knows that he’s tricking us into treating him like the person he isn’t, like he’s one of us (and by “us” I don’t mean all of us are the same or do the same jobs or have the same identities). Alexa is basically someone who has succeeded in manipulating people into giving him free dances/handjobs/shows/phone sex.

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Well then . . . that about does it.

I feel a little ass-y about posting this, but kind of justified because I really wanted to emphasize the thing that matters more, I think, than creating a fake cum-hungry fantasy persona: it’s the hypocrisy of claiming to be a sex worker advocate WHILE YOU STEAL FROM THEM. The hypocrisy of “educating” people on transgender while you delete educational comments and corrections FROM PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY ARE. You know . . . stuff like that is bigger and more fucked-up than playing virtual dress-up. And I did want to provide an explanation for deleting my link to her and turning off all that ill-gotten traffic, so there you have it.

Note: I will not think less of you if you’re one of my readers or members and you continue to enjoy her blog (with a grain of salt please?) and I’m not saying that EVERYTHING on her blog is wrong, stupid or patently false; I’ve agreed with many things she’s said, and there WAS that awesome pet rabbit, Hansel. I definitely want to remind you, though, that all those pictures she posts? There are real people in them and real photographers who made them, so stop thanking Alexa for providing you with them, instead insist that she credits those in the images she shares so you can support (I hope) the people who ACTUALLY MAKE visual art/porn/erotica, not just steal it.

Oh man! I almost forgot that one time she told me I really *must* start waxing my twat, that my lovers would thank me for it. If you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time you probably know that I don’t take kindly to advice on pubic hair removal, even when coaxed with a wink and the promise of someone else appreciating it. Nothing against waxing, which I’m open to, just not so open to being patronized by someone who crows about her eversmooth grooming but has never shown a photo of her biscuit, if she actually has one.

Edited to add: just noticed a midnight post from Mistress Matisse on the subject.

Back in 2001 there were more teasey story-porn pictorials around; I loved them for the buildup and wish we had time to make all (or a lot) of our porn like that.

Here are a couple of 2009 examples from a couple of my favorite web chicks:

Sequoia Redd with Brandi Belle in the Penis Pump Challenge

Poor Cinderella

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I’d *love* to do a brain dump here of all the blog-drafts in my head, but I’m starving and trying hard to stop feeling guilty and worried about mistake(s) I/we made. I feel like we don’t have enough time or money to do anything RIGHT, but the truth is we do a lot of things right and fucking up every so often and doing some things half-assed a lot shouldn’t erase all of that. Plus I need to stop kidding myself that perfection is attainable with time and money. It’s not. It never will be. We could have all the time and hired help and money in the world and we’d STILL make mistakes. In fact, we’d probably have the resources to make even more of them with more embarrassing consequences.

Reminding myself: progress, not perfection. Promptly admit when I am wrong. Make amends. Use my own mistakes as a reminder not to judge other people so harshly.

We went to Seattle on Tuesday for Delia to do a shoot for Shemale Strokers; it’s extremely rare for either of us to shoot for other people so that was a good experience to get us out of our bubble. It looks like next time we’ll shoot something as a couple for SuckMyTrannyCock and I’ll do a solo blowjob and cum-on-the-boobs thing for another site. I can’t remember the last time I had anyone’s cum on me besides Delia’s.

Are we going to start shooting a whole bunch of hardcore for other sites to make quick money? No. There aren’t many people to shoot for in the area and it’s not exactly the direction we want to go anyway for a number of different reasons. On the other hand, if we had more time for traveling and to pornify ourselves with lots of trips to the gym and enough people to work with that we felt comfortable with (for example, people who shoot with condoms) it would be a nice adventure to do that for a few months and get more exposure for ourselves (leading to more exposure for our sites). At the moment, that’s not the plan, though. Maybe in the next couple of years before we totally enter granny status in the porn world.

Part of me is happy to have not had a typical porn industry experience so far, but another part of me feels like we’d be missing out to not experience more of it. The whole testing vs. condoms is a whole other ball of wax, too. While I know most of the diseases that are passed around in porn aren’t the end of the world I’m pretty fucking happy to have made it to this point in my life without herpes, for example, and I’d like to keep it that way. Allow me to clarify: no one is banging down our doors to shoot hardcore, I’m just speaking hypothetically here. Also, I’m not saying that I wouldn’t have sex with someone who has herpes (I *have*) or that I think condoms should be mandatory in porn (I don’t), I’m just saying that my comfort level and goals aren’t conducive to jumping into a hardcore porn fuckfest any time soon. I think we both have too many boundaries and limits to get much work on top of me not being in my prime.

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We decided to get a room that night instead of driving all the way back home; one of the bridges we have to cross is having problems and closes for tests every day and all night, plus we haven’t had a night to ourselves off cam in a billion years so we even boarded our dog. It was bliss, and we really should get away for quiet private time on a regular basis AWAY from home; I love working at home for ourselves, but I totally miss the feeling of LEAVING work behind to drive home. We don’t have that and it gets really heavy to never really escape.

We even went to see a movie! Yes, we actually saw A Christmas Carol. I enjoyed it and am glad we saw it on the big screen. Jim Carrey channeled a WEE bit too much of Mr. Burns, but he’s my favorite so that’s fine.

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This weekend and the rest of the month we’re trying to shoot as much as we can for our sites here at home. We also got some stressful but potentially good news about our favorite spycam site to broadcast on which alleviates some of the nagging worries we’ve had over the years but means we have to invest some time and money that we really don’t have into it.

I know it’s all going to work out, though.

How?

I’m not exactly sure. I don’t need to know everything about tomorrow, today.

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I wanted to post a members-only update last night but it’s getting pressed out later and later because the things I keep getting ready to post have to be postponed for one reason or another, namely because I don’t have time to finish them properly. It may turn out that I wind up editing and posting something we’re shooting tonight or tomorrow.

Here are a couple of boobie pics to make up for the lack of happy stimulation in my posts lately:

Mature Hourglass Figure

I know, I look CRAZY in the eyes, but I love the way that angle makes my shape look so hourglassy! These pics are from my two most recent members-only updates, fyi.

My bumpy boobies in black & white!

There are more free samples at TrixieAndFriends.com and perhaps some other non-nude stimulation you’ve missed on my twitpic page (and my new sexypeek feed) but obviously(?) if you want ALL of my goodies, you should  join/become a member!

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In other news it’s been a busy week and we wrapped it up perfectly with shows and members-only chat yesterday and today. I started getting a migraine last night during my show which was the perfect opportunity to beg Delia to fix me some coffee which I avoid like the plague except when I need the caffeine to stave off a big whopper of a headache. SO DELICIOUS, though. I love the flavor of sweetened, creamy coffee! And it was because of that, my friends, that I was able to concentrate on that blog post I made last night about porn being consumed in public places.

Today I’ll be lucky if I get a couple of emails written/sent that need to go out; I didn’t get enough sleep so might need a nap, then we’re spending the evening at a really huge Thanksgiving potluck celebration that’s very special to us. I have a good kind of PMS right now and think I might bawl rivers of gratitude.