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A couple of random notes:

I accompanied Delia to get her first Botox injections today. I was kind of jealous and can totally understand how some people get addicted to those kinds of procedures. I thought for sure the doctor would try to sell me on something as long as I was just standing there, but the only notice he took of me was after his juvederm speech to look over at me and remark, “your cheeks are awesome. You will never need fillers.”

I’m not sure how to handle some compliments (like this sweet one comparing me to Kate Moss), but compliments on my cheeks or cheekbones always make me happy. I think because it’s a remark on something that seems very objective and sounds like a structural analysis. It seems very specific and rational, almost impersonal, so I can accept that kind of flattery. Plus I think it’s accurate. I believe that I *do* have awesome cheeks! Note: I can also graciously accept compliments on specific ways I am “weird”.

*****

Do you wish I would now talk about how I feel about cosmetic surgery and enhancements and stuff? Maybe another time. Or do you wish I’d sputter about how Kate Moss is a bad role model for young women? Oh gosh . . . don’t even get me started. It makes me really fucking irritated when people jump all over her skinny ass like she’s personally responsible for all of the eating disorders in the world. I don’t think we’re healing women of insecurity by rabidly insisting that skinny women aren’t “real”, which goes back to how I feel about cosmetic stuff; no matter how much silicone you put in your body and how your skin is moved around and your fat excised, YOU ARE STILL A REAL PERSON and should be treated as such. Yeah, I think it’s all very problematic and stuff, but whatever. It’s all too fascinating to blog about in depth right now (no, I’m not being sarcastic: this stuff FASCINATES me though it does sometimes bore the fuck out of me, too . . . I’ve even felt a kind of spiritual awakening reading about people who are extremely addicted to cosmetic body mods). Personal request: PLEASE don’t make any assumptions about me or my beliefs based on this paragraph; I just don’t have time to go into the complexities and nuances right now.

*****

The second thing I wanted to mention is that Charmin Ultra Strong toilet paper is THE BEST!!! It’s advertised as being applicable in situations where you want “a Dependable Clean” but it’s also marvelous in settings where you merely want a soft and delicious dry. I highly recommend this toilet paper to anybody looking for a thick luxury wipe or cheapskates who limit TP rations to two squares per job.

One of the things I dislike about shaving between my legs is that the stubble shreds lesser toilet papers (MD) and I’m left with little wads of white all over my vulva. CUS has solved this problem for me. Honestly, the quality of my life has been significantly improved by giving Charmin Ultra Strong a spin. This is my personal testimonial . . . I’m not receiving any kickbacks from Charmin for it. It’s just a very important consideration for someone like myself who takes great pleasure in pooping, etc.

I know there are more important things in the world to concern myself with, but toilet paper is the only product that interacts with me in an intimate way multiple times each day.

Yes, I know this post is BEGGING for your PUNNY comments!

Yesterday I catalogued our inventory of sex toys in a spreadsheet to try to keep track of which ones we have (and haven’t) shot with.

This is the Tantus Sport which I got from their closeout section in a clearance color; I’ve gotten a lot of spectacular (and low-priced silicone toys) from them. In fact, my favorites are ones they don’t make anymore.

We have over fifty sex toys, which is pretty awesome. Really a dream come true, I have to say. There have been others over the years we’ve thrown away because they were cheap/dangerous jelly or broke/got used-to-death.

Crazily, we have barely shot photos or videos with more than a handful of them. We use a lot of them during our live webcam shows so it seems like we get/have gotten a lot of use from them, but there aren’t actually a ton of pics or masturbation-with-toys videos on our sites. Pretty dumb, eh? Hence the spreadsheet.

The Tantus Goddess vibrating dildo (a gift from FurryGirl’s Sensual Vegan):

Lately I’ve been CRAVING new toys in categories we don’t have. Example: we don’t have any big “realistic” toys in our collection which seems like a SERIOUS oversight, especially considering how few of my close webwhore colleagues seem into those types of things and how TOTALLY into them I am (so it seems like a good niche for me to “fill”, hardy har har). Sure, I like the way our “non-representational” dildos FEEL, but I fucking love seeing chicks spreading themselves out with big fat fake pricks and I love the way realistic “dongs” look especially when there are good contrasting colors between the head and the shaft (hello, Black Thunder). I totally want more DONGS.

One of two Head O State Obama dildos we bought:

I can’t allow myself to purchase any more sex toys, though, until we’ve shot more with the ones we already have. Even though I totally want a pussy pump, more stainless steel, DEFINITELY more artistic stuff like carved wooden dildos, art glass, & unique molded silicone insertables. AND BIG DIRTY DICK-SHAPED DILDOS, like I already mentioned. Just can’t let myself get them. I’m not sure why we never got on the bus that has sex toy manufacturers constantly sending us unsolicited samples, but that’s just never happened to us, I’m sad to say.

I did get a couple of toys to review from the nice folks at Pleasure Me Now, but I stalled out after the glass dildo when I couldn’t bring myself to properly review the smart balls I was super excited about trying but was then unsuccessful at enjoying. Not that they asked me to only write positive reviews — they didn’t — but I felt like I hadn’t given those GIGANTIC FUCKING BALLS a fair shake and kept procrastinating on setting aside time to really give them a good trial. Sometimes my anal retentiveness is an obstacle to getting freebies.

One of the problems with our sex toy collection (and pretty much everything we buy to wear or use in photo shoots) is the constant struggle to decide between buying A LOT of cheap and semi-generic things on our limited budget or buying A FEW unique and really marvelous things . . . and not being able to buy anything else for months. Usually I wind up buying more for less rather than investing a bunch of money in a very-few expensive and spectacular items. We buy most of our clothes second-hand or on sale and same goes for the toys, so I rarely spend more than $40 on a single toy. Which is why I have zero “realistic” dildos, since all the good ones are in the $60-$90 range (and are made of questionable, possibly-hazardous and hard-to-clean materials making the investment even LESS sound since Delia and I might not be able to share them or get very many miles out of them or they’ll stain if we get lipstick on them, etc.). It doesn’t really make sense, since even with these frugal choices designed to give us (and our members) more variety I’m not even using all of the stuff AND I *still* use certain things OVER and OVER again (like my Hitachi Magic Wand).

It’s the whole dilemma of “do I buy five crappy Frederick’s of Hollywood corsets or one REAL corset?” And then the ultimate challenge of making use of everything, which is where I actually fall down on the job(s). But who wouldn’t after exhausting all those brain cells on making these tough shopping decisions? Most members don’t give a fuck anyway as long as you’re regularly posting something new and hot — the mileage you can get on one slimline vibe, a little hard work and a cheap pair of pantyhose is pretty remarkable, but in terms of standing out in a crowd with your promo materials and really presenting something SPECIAL that continues to be personally exciting sometimes you want things that are fancy, different, stylish, etc. Well, almost all the time I want those things. And never quite succeed in getting them. Which leaves me with something average which is tiresome.

Even more tiresome? All of this is leading into yet another blog entry about shopping for sexy stuff which I’ll try to post soon but I had no idea I was going to spend an hour writing THIS one.

It’s time for me to brag about being in another book, so get a load of me in my sexy attire of choice before the boasting begins:

Here I am with the book, Best Sex Writing 2008:

The book isn’t full of erotic fiction, it’s an anthology of extremely provocative non-fiction pieces covering sex from challenging and unusual (but important and relevant) perspectives. Rachel Kramer Bussel edited the collection (and is looking for submissions for 2009).

Check out Audacia Ray’s video review of the book to get a better idea of my piece and the book. When she says “period porn” she is not talking about porn featuring people dressed up in anachronistic costumes; she’s talking about the the porn you find on BloodyTrixie and EroticRed.

For me, the best part of being included in this anthology is getting exposure to a topic that at first glance seems very “special interest” (the freedom to make and sell porn featuring menstruation) but really challenges people’s assumption that we live in a country where free speech is protected, women own their own bodies, and capitalism rules. We don’t. It’s exciting to know that more people are going to be exposed to the marginalized truth that fringe-dwelling pornographers like myself live every day.

The stand-out parts of the book in total are its depth of exploration and diversity of topics; a lot of mainstream media coverage of sex is so shallow, boring and repetitive. So much that we read and hear about sex is either a) entertainingly dismissive or b) hyper-judgmental fear-mongering. It’s usually some dumbed-down story to get ratings or clicks presented by people who really don’t know what they’re talking about. Sex is held at arm’s length and treated as something that doesn’t effect “real” life (except in a predatory way) or Matters of Serious Consequence.

I love the idea of people being shown by this book that THEY’VE BEEN MISSING OUT on fascinating, puzzling, and complex stories of personal and political import. This book is loaded with surprises and challenges while maintaining its readability. Each piece’s tone and subject is so different from the others that it makes me feel giddy hoping people will realize they’ve been gypped by not being told more stories like these before. The contents of Best Sex Writing 2008 show the field of sex journalism’s enormous scope in a way that makes it impossible to dismiss as fluff.

I’M HOLDING A DRAWING AT THE END OF MARCH TO WIN AUTOGRAPHED COPIES OF BEST SEX WRITING 2008:

Who can enter:
Anyone with an active membership to TastyTrixie.com, TrixiesHouseboy.com, DeliaCD.com or SpyOnUs.com during between today (February 28th) and March 31st is eligible.

How to enter:
Email me with your username and mailing address stating you want to be in the drawing. I don’t want to automatically enter everyone with a membership since some people may not even want the prize or may not have a safe address to receive parcels from webwhores.

How many:
If more than one hundred (100) members email me to be in the drawing, I will draw for a second book. If more than 200 members email, I’ll draw three (and so on). That way people will at least have a 1/100 chance (or better) of winning no matter how many new people join our sites.

Watch the drawing:
Tuesday, April 1st at 4 PM Pacific Time on our spycams and in our members-only chatroom.

Every sex toy connoisseur should have a glass toy. If my video (see below) doesn’t convince you, perhaps this review of my first glass toy, Blue G-Spot Pleasure Swirl, will.

A lot of people love glass toys just because they’re so pretty; there’s a reason for the note on this one that it won’t stand up on it’s own: because people love to display them like they’re Chihulys. Mine reminds me how much I loved marbles when I was little, not to shoot, but to hold and inspect. I would project myself into those little spheres like they were snowglobes of other planets or little mermaid shelters. The weight of the glass and the colorful ribbons and swirls inside are so pleasurable to hold and peer into.

The sexiest reason to love glass toys is that they’re HARD: when you’re stimulating your g-spot or prostate, you want something firm with no give, and something that gives you enough leverage to put a high level of pressure on the right spot; this toy does that with the glass and a nice amount of length to get a good grip and really grind. I’ve found that it also helps to have a toy with a pronounced curve if you want to really work on your g-spot and unfortunately, my first glass toy doesn’t have enough of an angle for me to say it’s absolutely PERFECT for that task. I still made it work, of course, because I’m a pro (haha), but for vaginal penetration and g-spot stimulation, I think I’d prefer something like THIS (with full curve) or this beauty (in a delicious large).

Not only do those toys have more pronounced curves, they have bigger, more bulbous heads which I also prefer for working over my g-spot; it’s not that I need or want a huge phallus (in my next toy review you’ll see that just a little bit bigger can be TOO big) but I do like a little more popping action from a dildo when I’m masturbating and more surface area for stimulating my g-spot.

After trying it out on my pussy, I decided this toy is actually the perfect size for my ass. Here, let me show you:

Video taken from webcam show archive, hence the low quality.

As many of you know, I’m not a big double penetration fanatic, but this dildo would be perfect for reaching around and sliding up my butt while Delia’s cock fucks my pussy; the shaft is long enough to not require too much contortion and the straightness of the toy means she’d probably be able to feel it really well while she’s inside of me.

I feel compelled to mention some of the “boring”, practical reasons people (especially women) love glass toys: they’re non-porous, easy to thoroughly clean, great for people with allergies, shifty pH balances, or sensitivities to chemicals (which most cheap sex toys have), and they’re compatible with all lubes (unlike many silicone toys which go gloopy if you use them with silicone lubes). Glass toys are on the expensive side, but they have a long life: they won’t get discolored, they won’t melt in the sun, they won’t tear or get bent out of shape and I have never heard of anyone chipping, breaking or shattering a glass toy either; that is saying something since I’m in an industry where people share this kind of information and talk to each other about their favorite toys, their biggest toy failures, and their sex toy accidents. We really USE our toys often and put them through a lot of abuse — we’ve all dropped toys during webcam shows and shoots so none of us want anything even remotely fragile. In fact, I know a couple of chicks with their own sites who use glass toys almost exclusively — not just because they’re pretty but because they prefer the way they feel and that they’re made with a safe material that doesn’t give them a chemical burn.

You might wonder why I haven’t reviewed my first glass toy’s efficacy for clitoral stimulation; that’s because I mostly use vibrators when I masturbate my clit (which means the ENTIRE network of nerves; as you saw in the video I can put my magic wand above the head of my clit and get a trickle-down effect). If I weren’t so lazy, though, I’d say a glass toy of any kind would be great all lubed up and stroking a clit, especially if you were watching yourself in a mirror (yes, I like watching myself, specifically my pussy, while I masturbate); if I still lived alone, I’m sure I’d do exactly that. I would hold the glass dildo by the shaft, aim the lube-heavy head downwards, placing it just above my clit, then I’d slide the head down over my clit and up, down and up, repeatedly. I think this would work especially well with legs closed, and in this case the smaller girth and less bulbous head would work perfectly nestled between chubby labia, sliding up and down over my clit. The smooth surface of the glass is great because there’s no drag with lube and you can also heat and chill glass toys.

Long story short: I can’t wait to add more glass to my toybox!