TastyTrixie.com

Posts Tagged ‘nature’

*A fat, bizzy bumblebee rode around with me in the dashboard & windshield area until I rolled my windows down all the way and she blew out. She had a big orange fuzz corset on.

*Our power bill has gotten smaller the past couple of months; I think I just paid the last really big one ($183). When I see the next bill it’s going to feel like SUMMER! Or maybe not, though . . . it’s been a coldish spring so far. I’m not with the folks complaining about the rain, though — I love it.

*Turkey Vultures! Delia explained to me how to quickly differentiate them from eagles and other raptors, etc. in flight – their wings are dihedral.

*Everyone’s talking about the apocalypse coming tomorrow, but it’s looked like that on the peninsula for years, getting worse and fucking worse with endless driving through clearcuts and “reforested” hellholes. It’s a sad, ugly wasteland of destruction and corporate grotesquery devoid of biodiversity.

A woman and her children watched her husband/their dad jump into a river and disappear when shitstain federal agents questioned them about their immigration status after the forest “service” caught them illegally harvesting sa1a1 & called the B0rder Patr0l. Hahaha . . . isn’t it HILARIOUS how selective we are about caring for natural resources?

Imagining myself dressed up in a giant green sa1a1 costume, like a 5′2″ walking bush of sa1a1 and following those assholes from the DHS around, harassing the shit out of them and publicly mocking them and all the moron racists who love living in a police state. I could make such a grand ass of a nuisance out of myself, crying out “donyou wanna check my papers? I’M AN ILLEGAL BUSH!!” Don’t be surprised if you don’t hear from me after that, though, since they aren’t reporting the names or even numbers of people they arrest, put into detention centers, DISAPPEAR, etc.

I know it’s not the right thing to say or the right way to say it, but DAMN I’m glad I’m white! Someday I’ll have to use this white privilege for something useful, though I will not go so far as to sacrifice myself by becoming a burning bush. But wouldn’t that make a great story?

*Speaking of great/bizarre stories, have you read about this planking fad that claimed at least one man’s life? I for one find the desire to become a stiff board (or an evergreen shrub!) extremely compelling. Unfortunately my core isn’t strong enough to pose for highly sought after (I assume they’re highly sought after, anyway) nude planking pics.

If the end IS nigh, it delights me to know this is how we’ll go out . . . planking! But for god’s sake, follow the fucking rules! I can’t abide a plank with a big shit-eating grin on its face:

When performing a Plank:

1/ You must always lay face down, ensuring your face remains expressionless for the duration of the Plank.
2/ Your legs must remain straight, and together with toes pointed.
3/ Your arms must be placed by your side, held straight and fingers pointed.
4/ You must make it known that you are Planking. Saying ‘I am Planking’ usually get this across. Sternly announcing it will ensure a good result.

-via official facebook planking page

*When we were at the beach we didn’t realize it was whale-watching time until someone told us the day we left that lots of gray whales had been seen. I felt a little pang of regret, but with the little amount of time we had left to scope out the ocean from behind a little veil of trees I actually felt more interested in watching the birds (and I’m not just talking about turkey vultures, either!).

An older couple at the table behind us worked on a crossword puzzle; the man knew the answers but couldn’t spell “Rihanna” or “Uhura“. He thought he could, though. But I heard him saying the letters and he was all wrong. Then I found out that I only thought I knew how to spell “mascarpone” so I guess we’re even.

Taken around dinnertime today in our backyard:

5:37 PM, May 29th, 2010 - Wet Whiskery Budding Poppy

There are lots more poppies in this part of Washington than where I grew up and my favorites are the huge salmon-colored ones, like the one above just starting to unfurl. I’ve had my eye on it the past week or so; it’s the only one we have in our yard, and like everything else in our yard seems to be there by accident.

It’s Memorial Day weekend, which is a big ole get-drunk-for-three-days kind of deal to most people, which is a small part of why I’ve been celebrating the drizzle for the past five days and the forecast for five more days of the same. Because I’m a disapproving asshole who hates the way most people celebrate this holiday and the way they don’t appreciate (and even resent) the rain. Where we live the rain hasn’t been the kind that would ruin doing stuff outside; it’s the perfect kind that invites people like me outside into it while the other kinds of assholes avoid it.

But I haven’t gone out in it the way I wish I could would. We have too much work to do. I know not much of it seems to be showing up, but I have *great* beginnings on so much of it! And then I run out of steam or have to divert my steam to starting something else. We did shoot and post this video for members to jack off to and I hope to post another one tomorrow. We have to shoot as much content as possible before Delia’s surgery and also try to promote our sites so we can actually make sales. Not a lot of time left for other stuff without mind loss, but I have spent time looking out the windows. It’s been beautifully and consistently overcast without constant rain so the birds are still active and I can gaze outside without a bunch of glaring sunshine giving me a headache.

While I drove home from the store today I wound up behind some drunk jackass in a giant, perfectly-clean pickup truck, weaving all over the road in both lanes and the shoulder. I just laid on the horn, like “hooooooooooooooooonk . . . . hooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooonk” for five blocks at 25 miles per hour. It was a meaningless gesture of hatred: a fortuitous opportunity to express some of my distaste for the world. I actually laughed when I read the “breaking news” that BP’s “top kill” approach failed. Did anybody honestly think that would work anyway? Whatever.

On other news of the day: I love watching Dennis Hopper movies, but as a human being he’s NOT somebody I looked up to in an off-screen kind of way. I mean, YES, I may fantasize about a threesome with me, Paul Newman and Dennis Hopper in their primes, but in real life Dennis Hopper probably deserves to be ass-raped all the way to hell and back. Google “Roman Polanski” and “Dennis Hopper” if you want to know ONE reason why.

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Shit. I really just wanted to post a pretty picture of a flower and write about how sweet the wet grass feels swishing around my ankles but alas . . . my attitude took a turn for the worse this evening and it makes me feel a little better to leach out some of the poison. It sucks because after writing a post like this I feel relief and am able to see and let go of some of my negative emotions, but by preserving them on my blog I’m probably making other people’s days feel ugly when they came here to feel GOOD. On the other hand, I know a lot of people are feeling depressed and helpless so

Okay, this isn’t going anywhere and I have two choices: delete or publish. And since I haven’t been posting much I’m just going to hit publish because posting something crappy is better than posting nothing as long as I don’t make it a long streak of crappy posts which reminds me: do you know what happens if you eat too many cashews? We covered up the spycams in the bedroom temporarily when we got an eyeful of the orange oil slick on the mattress. It didn’t smell, it just looked like someone spilled taco grease on the bed.

JUST LOOK AT THE FLOWER AND IGNORE ALL OF THE REST! The flower is real, its greens are whiskery, and the raindrops are like the most perfect drops of fake acrylic water to make it look more real and taking pictures of stuff that looks so real that it looks like the best fake is what nature photography is all about! blah blah blah accepting hugs now.

Speaking of raindrops and Paul Newman, did you know that Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid and Easy Rider are, like, the same movie and came out the same year? So envisioning having sexual relations with Paul Newman and Dennis Hopper at the same time isn’t really random at all.

Ever heard of Half Nekkid Thursdays (or HNT for short)? Well, I’m *years* late to the party, but Oasis reminded me it’s never too late, so here goes:

May Day flowers & the side of my boobs.

This photo is from one of my favorite sets of 2009 (or really EVER), a May Day gallery celebrating the seventh anniversary of my members-only area opening. I meant to blog about it at the time, but it slid past me.

You can check out more HNT pics here on the host’s most recent post. I love that most of the people doing it are amateurs showing off very rare and precious personal photos.

I must’ve had my head up my ass when I worried that reserving a cabin for three nights was too LONG for a porn-shooting trip without running water or electricity or phones or internet of any kind. More like NOT LONG ENOUGH.

Being in the woods on the Olympic Peninsula, the proper WET woods southwest of us (unlike what we have here in the dry rainshadow), always feels like heaven to me. I’m not exaggerating: HEAVEN. Like what it would/should look and feel like if there were to be that kind of a fantasy afterlife (except I wouldn’t have to be scared of having my scalp ripped off by a cougar in heaven, but I digress).

Anyway, it was great. FANTASTIC, the level of peace and tranquility I felt there. The lack of pressure and the way everything worked out just right. The way we had so much beautiful SPACE to sprawl out and shoot in with very little chance of intrusion. The way the weather couldn’t have been more perfect. The way we walked for miles.

And when we got home? I pretty much instantly fell apart into a nervous wreck.

It’s not that I think running off and living a “simple” life is the Answer to All My Problems or something I want on a daily basis (I don’t), but experiencing it for a few days did highlight some of the things that I desperately need to fix in real life (like not having so MANY options and obligations every second of every day).

It’s a small fix, but we’re going to get rid of DirecTV completely and of course just keep plugging away on the usual stuff with a better reminder of what we could have if we got ahead, just a little bit: the freedom to fall behind and drop out more often . . . AND make better porn because of it. It’s amazing how doing so much of my job every fucking day gets in the way of DOING MY JOB RIGHT.

Also, I have serious problems being distracted by every day life and PEOPLE and the noises they make and our computers and all of our shit, though, so coming home was like putting my head in a blender after all of that peace and quiet and fresh air. I know it sucks for voyeurs who want to watch a blissed-out horny woman rolling around in ecstasy or at least looking fresh and cute and bisected by cleavage but instead get me, frowning and muttering under my breath about how I’m going to shoot myself in the head if trivial problems and distractions interrupt my flow just one more fucking time. I am so sorry that has been the story of my lifecams for far too long.

Anyway, I would manually scratch all the skin off my left arm using the fingernails of my right if it would mean I could spend a third of my life in a cabin in the woods, peeing outside and eating pickled sausage on the back porch. Unfortunately I’ll have to go about things the hard way: plodding forward, tiny steps at a time.

FYI: I’ll try to post more about the magic of our little cabin experience. Also, I’m posting the rest of these pictures of me by the river on Monday for members. Delia is posting a set as I type this: see SAMPLE HERE – it is SO FUCKING AWESOME to be able to get almost any angle you want from whatever distance you want unconstrained by four walls.

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We have webcam shows (with masturbation and all that jazz) and members-only chat scheduled for tomorrow (Sunday) and Monday, so check out our schedule if you’re a member and perhaps we’ll see you then!