Friendshop

NOTE: I do not stand by any of the things in this post and may change my mind at any time!

The other day Delia needed me to leave her alone for a couple of hours, so I went to the library . . . and issued a spontaneous & vague invitation to any/everybody to come say hi to me there if you could find me.

Trixie loves the SPL

Spontaneous square seeks like-minded squares at downtown library.

Of course nobody showed up (to my knowledge); because how many 1) fans and friends do I have 2) in Seattle who 3) keep a constant eye on my twitter feed and 4) have nothing else to do on a Saturday but go to the library 5) immediately — if 6) they even recognized that’s where I was?

This is why I have no social life. Because my terms and conditions are unacceptable to normal people and the windows of opportunity are like comically malfunctioning elevators. I did know in advance I’d have this time to potentially interact with friends, but usually I like to spend most of my free time alone so I was afraid to extend invitations in advance and commit to hanging out with anybody. But then the idea of shaking hands and/or hugging strangers sounded pretty good, especially in a venue encouraging conversation devoted to something of interest to me: BOOKS.

Anyhoo . . . my mom will probably read this and worry about me, especially since there’s this absurd “new policy” where Seattle libraries have to obey state laws regarding carrying guns, spurring a local media blitz of misdirected consternation serving only to advertise something that you should be able to take for granted anywhere in our state, so I mostly just think it’s silly / not *extra* frightening.

I think it’s way more offensive and scary that it’s okay for people to watch porn in public places – librarians shouldn’t have to police that, but it’s absolutely fucking gross and unacceptable and intimidating and shitty to broadcast hardcore porn in the sanctuary of a library where people of all ages can see or hear it without consent. I can’t say I’d be all that sad if someone with PTSD got triggered by such a thing and blew some asshole’s dick off for that kind of a violation. I’m not talking about some porn window just popping up accidentally or if they were quietly watching something discreetly on their own device in such a way that nobody could see it without TRYING to spy on them. I’m also not talking about people giving each other hand jobs in a corner or some other sexy tom foolery in public where it’s not ONE LONE CREEP foisting his scene on others, getting off on making other people uncomfortable and drawing attention to his bullshit. It’s just not okay to force someone to participate in your predatory sexy time in public places. Except for those times when I was in elementary school and junior high and my friend and I would read dirty books in the library and our faces would turn red and if we had wieners you’d have been able to see our tween hard-ons through our pants. Except for that, because we weren’t being predatory . . . we were just MASTURBATING OUR HEADS.

If there’s such a thing as common sense, these are the times you should be able to use it instead of making stupid-ass inflexible policies.

I probably shouldn’t even post this, but FUCK IT.

Call me old-fashioned, but . . . yeah. Just . . . call me old-fashioned. I don’t know, maybe I’m ridiculously sensitive and easily offended and stuff. Also, I’ve got some double standards. I don’t know. I just don’t know!

Free Amateur Blowjob Video

Guessing nobody will mind me posting a blowjob video instead of a nudie pic of the day 😉
VIDEO0054.3gp Watch on Posterous

First amateur blowjob video of me sucking The Hunter’s cock yesterday.

Taken with my smartphone. Totally amateur, no makeup, using available/natural light in the cabin. After very little sleep because up almost all night fucking, over and over again.

If you feel inspired to give The Hunter a little feedback/appreciation, it might encourage more  content featuring his beautiful cock to be recorded and shared . . .

Dirty Girls & Sex Worker Voices

A lot of my esteemed colleagues are working on all sorts of different, exciting projects, mostly revolving around sex work and/or sex worker voices. Here are a few:

Tara and Sequoia just published their first issue of Dirty Girl Zine. Find out how to get a copy and support future issues on Tara’s hobostripper post:

Dirty Girl Zine

Dirty Girl Zine

Looks like the next issue revolves around “the intersections of class, dirt, and sex work” if you have something to submit. I haven’t even requested a copy to read/look at yet, let alone submitted anything, but I’m excited about anything/everything that they put together and am thankful for the work they’re doing with the zine and everything else they do and love.

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If you’re in or around North Carolina (many of our favorite people seem to be), check out Libby Lynn’s gallery showing “to see brand new oil portraits and other works featuring people working in the great American sex industry during this challenging recession”:

Sex Workers & Our Great Recession: by Libby Lynn

Sex Workers & Our Great Recession: by Libby Lynn

I would love to see Strippertweets oiled-up ass in person, and — more narcissistically — something Libby did depicting me in a strap-on also involving “burned wood, glass, chicken blood and menstrual blood.” I haven’t seen this transgressive piece of work yet (which is no doubt more subtle than me doing my Larry Flynt impression in a cloud of feathers, so don’t get TOO excited), but I’m very flattered to be included, especially using mediums that are right up my proverbial alley. The best part for me, from afar, is that she wrote me a really awesome email to tell me about it and reading it made me GLOW and smile and almost-cry.

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I’m at least a year late in mentioning The Red Umbrella Project, partly because I live too far away to participate in or attend the live events and because I pretty much hate listening to podcasts (I’m incapable of multitasking, so it’s not something I can do WHILE I work on other stuff) or watching videos of people talking or anything longer than about two minutes on the internet unless a cock is moving in and out of a fleshlight, and then I can handle about four minutes. But NORMAL people will love this site and the wide variety of stories and perspectives on sex work:

The Red Umbrella Project

The Red Umbrella Project

Plus, I’ll admit it, part of why I’ve avoided watching more than one or two of the videos (which were awesome, by the way) or setting aside time to listen to the podcasts is because it’s too emotionally intense for me, even when the stories are just funny. What I mean is that these stories and all of the work I’ve mentioned here and the people doing it are really important, and it makes it hard for me to relax and go about my daily business without being more involved myself. So I’ve pretty much been abstaining from paying attention to a lot of sex worker stuff that’s important to me because I can’t seem to do it in a casual way without feeling anxious and obligated and guilty. But YOU don’t have to feel that way! That’s why I’m telling you about it!!

Cabin: Day 4 (PIC) & HNT

Monday, 9/6/2010: Day 4

This is the day I moved a vibrator into the cabin.

Post-orgasm with the vibrator I brought to the cabin.

Post-orgasm with the vibrator I brought to the cabin.

I still haven’t taken a nap here but now I’ve broken in the loft with masturbation and orgasms. There’s no internet access here (a good, preferable, integral thing to this whole cabin experience) and I don’t have any dirty books here, so I was very limited in terms of porn to accompany my vibrator time. I’ve only downloaded three videos (not counting that Gossip Girl episode) to this laptop and those were all for research purposes just to gauge their quality so out of those I chose to masturbate to a teaser video Delia made last year.

I skipped through the parts I’m in to get to the real meat of the thing/away from visions of myself. I wanted to come to her Twin Peaks-y schoolgirl-in-plaid-skirt-and-white-panties thing, but  it’s hard to time things just right with a short compilation video like that meant merely to entice. I’m a chick with a vibrator though, so I got off on it three times. It makes me extra excited, actually, and I come faster when I’m “afraid” that the part I like is going to end REALLY FAST . . . when I know my favorite parts are limited. I didn’t time it properly the first time and wound up climaxing as she was eating her cum on the donut (totally NOT what I want to orgasm to, though I love directing her to eat it), but I did better the other times.

I also wrote an outline and some notes for a short story. I might have done some other stuff, too.

45113638_202b79dc11

You can check out other people’s “Half Nekkid Thursday” pics for this week here (links are in the comments). If you like truly amateur / non-porn-pro stuff, you should definitely check it out.

Pretty Mommy Like Poetry (PICS)

Warning: this post might gross out some people, so if a certain word in the title makes you uncomfortable, the rest of this entry will probably heighten your discomfort:

I SO enjoyed my nightgown camshow last month (and had an awesome one the day before, too). I wore a long nightie that always makes me feel SO sexy and SO pretty and such a feminine tease. Someone I worked with years ago gave me three Eileen West nightgowns I never ever would have bought for myself, but now that I have them I want a dozen more:

Big Boobs Look Plush Under Pleated Cotton Nightgown

Big Boobs Look Plush Under Pleated Cotton Nightgown

I guess I just really like the feeling of white lengths of cotton flowing all over my body with no panties or bra (like my long white May Day dress).

Pretty lady in long cotton nightgown looks like a sweet mommy tucking you in.

Pretty lady in long cotton nightgown looks like a sweet mommy tucking you in.

I *especially* like the way these nighties make my jugs look so generous and mobile and soft with the pleats adding more fabric to accentuate them bursting forward. So so ripe and full.

Modest and non-nude, but suggestive and succulent

Modest and non-nude, but suggestive and succulent

In my show it was like poetry, talking about being a lady in a long nightgown, and what ladies in long nightgowns like to do and how their pussies get so wet underneath their long long nightgowns. I felt so pretty and iconically feminine, like if Victoria magazine included porn (never gonna happen, I know). Don’t you just want to push that white cotton up-up-up? And see and smell some soft, furry bush?

Free pics of me from a few years ago in a similar night gown: http://www.trixie.com/tgp/Trixie/see-through-nighty

It’s gross I guess, but I also love how skinny my arms and legs look wearing this nightgown. It’s the most feminine interpretation of skinniness, I think. Everything looks so long and pretty and gracefully awkward compared to everything in the middle looking so abundant and juicy.

It made me want to log in to the pay-to-view camsite I’ve been working and make all the boys want me to be their pretty mommy in her modest white nightgown. It’s such a familiar mommy-in-summer look, the soft cotton wafting faded mommy perfume and hugging hands reaching out on long arms to drawn you in. There’s nothing overtly sexual about it except that it’s all ALL all woman, and the modesty is the most naked you might get. A silhouette if the light is right, a sour-sweet stubbly armpit, some long pale leg if she gathers it up a little to step through the dewy lawn to get the paper in the morning.

It’s a look that provokes powerfully confusing strong feelings in a lot of people of both innocent love and taboo lust.

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That day we had more people in members-only chat than we’ve had in MONTHS, which also boosted my spirits terrifically. And really everything started looking up on Thursday when and after we fucked (don’t you think this is true?).

Sleepy mommy-type's big Victorian "dirty pillows"

Sleepy mommy-type's big Victorian "dirty pillows"

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If you want to get me a similar nightgown or inexpensive night slip to fill out my pretty mommy wardrobe, I have a couple ON SALE on my wishlist! It would be nice to have a couple of new drowsy sleepytime gowns to wear this summer.

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I hope to blog more later about 1) the camming I’ve been doing and 2) my own shame, discomfort and conflicted feelings about role plays I get off on.

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