I ordered three toys for Tucker and they just arrived today — I cannot WAIT to incorporate them into shoots for him, and even for me! I’ve always been extremely erotically fascinated with guys resourcefully using household objects to masturbate with or buying embarrassing toys. I’m not sure why I’ve waited so long to purchase some little toys, since I set it out for it to be a prime focus of his site, but it took a member requesting it for me to get on the ball and order some.

Oh! Shopping for them kindled a desire to collect as many silly masturbation sleeves as possible. I absolutely adore the retro obscenity, the simplicity, and in some cases the ugliness of these little jelly and rubber sculptures. I love the tiny representations of people; little women and little men, reduced to torsos, or buttocks with pinprick holes, or mouths with garishly painted lips. It’s incredibly kinky to me, their primitive nature, small size, and lack of sophistication — they shouldn’t work at all but clearly THEY DO. For many men. Little dirty toys to stick my dick into!!! Tiny little nipples to brush my thumb against!! Apricot-colored rubber legs covered by apricot-colored rubber stockings, recognizable by the raised bands of apricot-colored rubber on each of ther thighs. The distended open-mouthed gape of a green harpy standing on tiptoes. I want to collect these tiny women, these cheap creations of men. Ooooh but I wish I had a penis to stick into them. To reduce myself to achieving happiness by forcing my penis into unsophisticated pockets of cool synthetic bliss. To thrust myself into a palmful of sculpted rubber distended by my prick. To hide my crude synthetic girlfriends in drawers where no one else will ever see them and their little orphan annie eyes.

I love the way the holes and the details are arranged into a compact nonsensical design: pussy in the heel of a foot, pussy in the stumps of amputated legs. You know how when you’re masturbating you can reach every pleasurable part of your own and someone else’s anatomy without any reaching or awkwardness? Boobs, ass, pussy, cock, mouths, etc. are all within easy reach and view.

Strange but true.

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